I remember driving by Gasworks Park on a sunny day last spring. I had just decided that I was ready to experience the energy of material abundance and, with a very clear mind, recited a mantra (powerful sacred sounds) known for inviting that. Within the hour I'd received a call from Cirque du Soleil telling me they would like me to replace the lead singer of “O” while she went on maternity leave. The power of vibration? I believe so. Grace? Certainly all this and more loving Mystery were at work from the Source of Sound.

I have learned so much in my time singing for Cirque du Soleil. The challenges over nearly 7 months of singing 10 shows for nearly 20,000 people weekly have motivated me to dive deeper into a daily practice to strengthen my technique and precision in singing, and have offered me tools regarding posture and breath, that I look forward to sharing with others and deepening in myself.

Something that I feel moved to offer now, in this busy time, is about focus. It is a reminder that we really are so free, and so beloved in this moment now. It is a full exhale with faith in the next breath. A welcome mat to the home of our body. An invitation to be WITH rather than against, the elements in our surroundings.

In the past, I have enjoyed closing my eyes and being “carried away” when I sing. It feels good! However, at Cirque, I am asked to sing precisely composed songs in imaginary languages, while making mid-song adjustments to my headphone mix on a computerized 16-channel console, and simultaneously paying attention to spoken directives from the technical and musical directors. At first, I felt like a waitress with too many tables rather than a singer offering a gift.

I am, however, discovering out of this challenge a deeper ability and pleasure in a sort of “open-eyed focus” - a way to be with all of these seeming “demands” without needing to block one out or judge any as annoying intrusions. The key for me is in staying with what does not change, what is not separate from any of those elements: that is, my own direct experience. So, whereas it had been my habit to see my need to adjust the sound console as a distraction to the act of singing, I can often just experience the impulse arising in me to adjust it without the subtle fear that it is going to take me away from something more important. Where can it take me, when I'm right here?

And simultaneously, with soft awareness, I may feel an impulse to add more intensity to a certain note or choose to soften my chest. This too, I can allow to bring me to deeper awareness of my own direct experience of this moment. It is this present time awareness that offers me all the power and feeling I need to sing my best, with power and precision and feeling. It is like softening the gaze and beginning to see the things to the left and right, while maintaining my ability to see the screen in front of me where I am typing.

When this presence and awareness arise, singing flows easily and with grace. When I am subtly fighting against an experience, or an element of it, I notice that some of the power and focus is siphoned off into the battleground in my mind. I have a choice. In those moments when I remember, I can release the need to see those things requesting my attention as an intrusion to something more important, and see them rather as part of this precious moment. When this happens, I find I have more energy and pleasure to offer to singing and to my life.

May we all come home to the ease and safety of this present moment. I feel great gratitude for the voice and its Source for being such an efficient pleasurable vehicle for experiencing This.